I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize