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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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