dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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