i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
