Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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