Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
There's even glitter on my cock...
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