walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
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