i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Randomize