Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I am naked and annoyed.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
