Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
