Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
