Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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