i wish peter jackson would direct porn
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
