Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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