I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
