is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
