I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
