watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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