sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
So much Jack, so little girl.
Dicks are not precious.
Randomize
