I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
now i know why i became what i already was.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
