Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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