Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
What a dumb baby whore.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
