CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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