I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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