I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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