Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
