Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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