You're my little dorito
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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