his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
