There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
ttyl tear gas
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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