you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
