I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
