Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
