I hope mine doesn't look like that
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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