Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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