omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
you never un-have a 4some
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
