nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
