i don't like sucking hair
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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