I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
