so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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