Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
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