Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
