I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
