eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
