Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
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