I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
