U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
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