capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
