People in love make me want to vomit
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
