my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize