we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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